Interesting questions. Thanks. I had hoped that in my earlier post I had managed to indicate there are standards in the Code of Canon Law and also in Ponam in Deserto Viam. There are further guidelines in the other texts I cited, especially for formation of contemplatives. If the hermit wants to join with other c 603 hermits in a laura they are free to do so. I am part of a small virtual laura with four, possibly five, diocesan hermits from the US and Great Britain. We meet monthly by ZOOM and though we are quite different from one another in many ways, we are aware we are each called to and live the same vocation in our own significant ways. We are currently slowly discussing Cornelius Wencel's book on the Eremitic Life and exploring the ways we each live the values or constitutive elements of our vocations, how we have grown in this, how we can assist and support one another and so forth. Such virtual lauras allow us to hear the wisdom of our elders (a matter of experience, not age!) and to ask questions when we are dealing with a real problem or something difficult. This kind of situation, combined with spiritual direction, the input of a delegate, and the supervision of one's bishop, is both demanding, challenging, and consoling. It fosters growth more than any list of standards might do.
Even when a diocese has a common list of standards or guidelines, each vocation must be measured, discerned, formed, professed and consecrated, as well as supervised separately. Nothing else does justice to the profound and unique relationship between the hermit and God. This is God's vocation entrusted to the Church and to the hermit through the Church's mediation. Both hermit and Church must be subservient to God by discerning each vocation separately, especially once the essential qualities have been embraced by the hermit. While it is always possible to meet for group direction, each hermit will have her own director as well. This is the nature of the solitary eremitical vocation. I am not sure I would say that someone who tried solitary eremitical life and found it was not what she felt called to a failure. It is simply a step on her road of discernment and human formation. I personally don't believe anything is wasted in such attempts, but yes, many people will try to become diocesan hermits, and the majority will not succeed. There are many different reasons for this, and many do not reflect on the individual candidate at all.Also, some diocesan hermits will want to try this ministry or that one as part of their eremitical vocation. They will be given time to try these and discern whether or not it is truly consistent with the hermit's life in the hermitage and then, whether it enhances her life in hermitage. Part of discernment is coming to understand not only what one feels called to but why. Some answers to this latter question suggest the hermit should not undertake the ministry, while others encourage the hermit, her director and delegate to support the project. The bishop is ultimately responsible for supervising the quality of the hermit's life, but the way a bishop supervises is not carved in stone (and some who "inherit" diocesan hermits professed by other bishops sometimes simply show no interest in supervising them. There is little a diocesan hermit can do in such a situation beyond requesting a conversation to discuss matters.
Fortunately, a hermit with a delegate, spiritual director, and even a mentor and/or virtual laura is ordinarily well watched over and assisted by all of these persons. Curiously and ironically, even with so many people involved in various kinds of accompaniment and consultation, the vocation remains a profoundly free and independent one that is dependent on God's love and the divine will more than anything else. Still, given the relative rarity and significance of the vocation, it is not surprising it requires serious dialogue with God and others all along the way.I sincerely hope this is helpful.