Stillsong Hermitage is a Catholic Hermitage (Canon 603 or Diocesan) in the Camaldolese Benedictine tradition. The name reflects the essential joy and wholeness that comes from a Christ-centered life of prayer in the silence of solitude, and points to the fact that contemplative life -- even that of the hermit -- spills over into witness and proclamation. At the heart of the Church, in the stillness and joy of God's dynamic peace, resonates the song which IS the solitary Catholic hermit.
Recently, in part because of the question I was asked about whether or not a hermit could or should sing office, I have been thinking more about the various tensions that exist in the eremitical vocation, especially the tension that exists between ecclesiality and solitude and also that between physical silence and what canon 603 calls "the silence of solitude". While I was listening to a favorite piece of music -- Allegri's Miserere Mei, Deus done by the Tenebrae Choir under the direction of Nigel Short -- I thought I could see a perfect representation of these elements and the tensions that exist between them at work in what is one of the most beautiful pieces I know. In some ways they reflect in a more vivid way the dynamics I know personally not only from living as a hermit with an ecclesial vocation, but also from playing violin both alone and in chamber groups and orchestras. I'll say a little about what I heard and saw in this production that was helpful to me in thinking about these central vocational elements and tensions below, but for now you might listen to this piece once or twice before reading on.
What struck me first is the dialogical nature of the work --- dialogical in a broad yet still profoundly personal sense of the term. Each and every person is dedicated to listening and responding on a number of levels, first of all to the composer and his music, notations, and text, but also to the director who interprets these realities and communicates this to the singers in gestures and expressions. Every person is listening not only to themselves and the quality of sound they are producing, but to every other person in the ensemble. Each person is listening to a pulse within themselves which moves through the music and silences (rests) as well as to a mental sense of the music-as-heard over many different and differing performances. These will all guide the music each singer makes in response as they perform or live this work with personal and musical integrity.
What also struck me about this particular performance is the way one can hear the massed sound of all the voices but also clearly distinguish the individual voices (sometimes with the aid of one's eyes as different singers enunciate different syllables and/or notes in time --- we listen with all of our senses). The singers blend perfectly but they only do so insofar as they sing their own part in careful response to the the dynamic context which lets them be themselves alone in relationship. I was reminded most of the ecclesial nature of the eremitical vocation as I thought about this --- the way a beautiful performance is enhanced and completed only as it is sung/lived as an integral part of the whole. I thought this was especially true of the young male soloist whose silence was as critical to the balance and completion of the music as were his solos.
The way the schola in the main stands apart from the larger choir and at times is entirely silent but still very much part of the music as they listen so as to respond appropriately also made me think of the distinction between physical silence and the silence of solitude. And again, that was even more clear to me with the single voice of the young man standing up and "apart" in the arches above the nave and schola. His voice was often "heard" only in its silence and always in relation to others' welcoming or receptive silence. How very much more than simple physical silence is this listening and participative silence!! It is foundational to the whole piece. When I think as well of the hidden but still-startlingly pervasive presence of the composer, his music, notations (not always easy to imagine what is meant here or there!), and depth of meaning of the text he is communicating, I think of the presence and place of God in the hermit's life --- and again, of the meaning of being bound to obedience in all of the myriad ways we must each allow and achieve if the music we are called to be is to be realized in all of its potential.
And finally, I was struck (and moved with a kind of poignant joy) at the way the now-silent soloist remained apart but very much present in the performance as the schola moved closer to the choir during the last portion of the piece and joined them in singing it. Again, a striking symbol or image for me of the profound difference between eremitical solitude or eremitical anachoresis (withdrawal) and being a lone person or individualist. It is the distinction between belonging integrally to the choir while making music in one's silence and merely standing apart mutely. It is this kind of silence the hermit brings to the Church as a whole, the charism or gift quality of eremitical life c 603 calls "the silence of solitude". As I have written here before, my very first experience of solitude (as opposed to isolation) and also of genuine community was of playing violin, both alone and in orchestra. That was in grade school when I was nine or ten. Now, all these years later music is still the most vivid symbol for my own understanding the nature of eremitical life and what canon 603 could well refer to instead as "the deep music of personal wholeness and holiness in God".
N.B., I am aware there were things which struck me about the Allegri which I haven't mentioned here --- not least the incredible control, power, and brilliance of the diminutive soprano doing the very high solo line. I thought how incredibly suited the human voice is for this and what an incredible instrument God has made in us as I watched and listened to her sing. In this way too we are language events. I was also struck afresh at how it is the way tensions are created and resolved in music that makes the most wonderful harmonies and create moments of real transcendence. Perhaps some of you will have other observations or reflections on the way the piece resonates with your own understanding of eremitical life or prayer, etc.
The text in both Latin and English can be found online (or cf. Psalm 51). Gregorio Allegri: Miserere Mei, Deus
This is one of my very favorite pieces, especially for Lent. I may have put it up here in past years. This miserere reminds us all that Lent is a time of conversion. In Benedictinism we are reminded that we fall and get up, fall and get up. In Christianity to be brought to our knees in repentance is to be raised to a profound dignity as human beings. Let us not be afraid or reluctant to be moved to our knees in this way. It is astounding how beautiful reality is from this position!
Preparing to profess solemn (perpetual) vows in the hands of Bishop Allen H Vigneron, Diocese of Oakland (Videos and slideshow of the liturgy are found in early September 2007 Blog entries)
"Sister, receive this ring for you are betrothed to the eternal King: Keep faith with your Bridegroom so that you may come to the wedding feast of Eternal joy."
love is a place & through this place of love move (with brightness of peace) all places
yes is a world & in this world of yes live (skillfully curled) all worlds
e.e. cummings
Canonical Granting of Cowl, Solemn (perpetual) Eremitic Profession
"Sister, Be faithful to the ministry the Church entrusts to you to be carried out in its name."
Contact Information
Questions and comments are always most welcome. That is especially true of questions that "seem" basic and which I may never really address (or reflect on!) otherwise. Please email all queries to me at SRLAUREL@aol.com. I will share and respond to them as appropriate here on the blog, or privately if you wish.
You may also write me at: Sister Laurel M O'Neal, Er Dio St. Perpetua Catholic Community 3445 Hamlin Road Lafayette, CA 94549
(Please know that during the pandemic I do not get to my mailbox at the parish often. Mail will sometimes be delivered to me at my hermitage by parishioners or parish staff but there can be delays in this so please be patient.)
Sometimes email ends up in my spam folder. This is particularly true if you have not written me before. If you haven't received a response, please write again or resend the original while changing the subject line to indicate this is a second attempt.
Clothing in Cowl, Solemn Monastic Profession (not my own of course)
"We have already mentioned above that the basic motive for choosing the solitary life in a hermitage consists in an existential longing to meet and talk to God. The hermit chooses silence in order to enter fully into a dialogue; (she) chooses solitude in order to meet closely a personal presence. The way of the desert is thus not a stray and arid path, it does not lead to the negation of all the values of the world and of other people. Just the opposite: it is the way of mutual presence, dialogue, and friendship that shines where two freedoms and two hearts, divine and human, meet." The Eremitic Life, Fr. Cornelius Wencel, er cam, p.96
The Eucharist is the center of everything that happens in the hermitage.
"Hope is not the conviction that something will turn out well, but the certainty that something makes sense regardless of how it turns out" Vaclav Havel
"Thanks to his consecration, the hermit step by step makes true in his life those words about being the light of the world that is not to be put under a bushel, but on a lampstand. Indeed, the hermit's calling is rather paradoxical, which causes a good deal of suffering for him. On the one hand, he is called to solitude, but on the other hand, he must bear witness to God's Kingdom to countless people. This only seems to be a contradiction. Its ultimate meaning and value becomes clear to the hermit over the course of his life. The contradiction can be understood only in the context of the Trinitarian mystery. The mystery of an inner exchange of love that constantly overflows in the bosom of the Trinity is on the one hand secret and silent, but on the other hand it initiates historical revelation and the redeeming mission of the Son and the Holy Spirit. According to Origen, God is simultaneously the Silent One, the One who speaks and the One who is spoken about.
The hermit also wants to see his mission between, so to speak, two extremes: between his solitary and hidden prayer and the testimony he gives to the world; between silence and the need to speak out. The hermit's life would have been torn to pieces and left miserably incomplete if he had tried to build on the foundation of his own ideas. But fortunately, the way of the desert is not his own invention, but a gift of the Holy Spirit. This Spirit, the unifying principle of the mutual relationships of the Holy Trinity, is also the source of unity and peace in the life of the hermit. " (pp 107-8, The Eremitic Life, Fr Cornelius Wencel, er cam.)
"The Christian solitary today should bear witness to the fact that certain basic claims about solitude and peace are in fact true, [for] in doing this [they] will restore people's confidence first in their own humanity and beyond that in God's grace." . . . The hermitage represents for the individual and society that place where the hermit, 'can create a new pattern which will fulfill (her) special needs for growth. . .and confront the triple specters of boredom, futility, and unfulfillment, which so terrify the modern American." (Thomas Merton, Contemplation in a World of Action, pp 242, 241)
Links for other Diocesan Hermits" Blogs and Websites
"What the eremitic life aims at is an inner, unifying meeting with God. Thanks to such a meeting, the hermit can understand better (her) existence. The hermit, by an intuition of faith becomes aware that (her) calling makes no sense without Christ and his revelation. She learns that her dignity and the meaning of her life are clear and decipherable only in the context of proclaiming God's Kingdom. That is why the eremitic life means finding the meaning and goal of our life in Christ who is the Word of God pronounced in history. That is faith. Here we can say that the dynamism of faith is always present where a simple and loving heart listens carefully to God's word pronounced still anew in the course of time. This word is so powerful and creative that it leads off and renovates the faith of a Christian who, as a result can participate in eternal things. " The Eremitic Life, Fr Cornelius Wencel, Er Cam, p.97.
"The decisive point is that God has spoken. God has addressed us and the human person is created by God as dialogical. The human being is created by God to be addressed. Faith is receptivity to this word. This receptivity becomes explicit in the language of prayer. If I know who and what I really am (God's dialogical partner), I will burst spontaneously into the prayer of praise and thanksgiving." J O'Connell, The Mystery of the Triune God, (London, 1987), p. 146.
"The Christian's life with the Word is the decisive point which distinguishes Christian prayer from all other types of prayer. This point follows naturally from the unique foundation of the Christian experience, namely that God has spoken. Hence God is ever to be found in his Word and this Word can never be bypassed. The danger of bypassing the Word is the danger of all types of mysticism." (J O'Donnell, The Mystery of the Triune God, pp 148-9)
i am a little church(no great cathedral) far from the splendor and squalor of hurrying cities --- i do not worry if briefer days grow briefest, i am not sorry when sun and rain make april
my life is the life of the reaper and the sower; my prayers are prayers of earth's own clumsily striving (finding and losing and laughing and crying) children whose any sadness or joy is my grief or my gladness
around me surges a miracle of unceasing birth and glory and death and resurrection over my sleeping self float flaming symbols of hope,and i wake to the perfect patience of mountains
i am a little church(far from the frantic world with its rapture and anguish)at peace with nature --- i do not worry if longer nights grow longest; i am not sorry when silence becomes singing
winter by spring,i lift my diminutive spire to merciful Him Whose only now is forever; standing erect in the deathless truth of His presence (welcoming humbly His light and proudly His darkness)
e.e. cummings
Fr Arthur Poulin, OSB Cam
Fr. Poulin’s paintings echo the Impressionists, yet he has developed his own original style. All his paintings begin with a black canvas. Through his contemplative process he starts with minute brush strokes, creating dots (mustard seeds) that will grow into the completed image. In the process he moves from darkness to light, the major theme of his work. When asked about his painting he speaks in terms of moving from the unknown to the known, from chaos to unity; which he sees as a sacred journey not to be feared.
The River, Fr Arthur Poulin, OSB Cam
Big Sur Spring, by Fr Arthur Poulin, OSB, Cam
Brief Rule of Saint Romuald
Sit in your cell as in paradise.Put the whole world behind you and forget it. Watch your thoughts like a good fisherman watching for fish. The path you must follow is in the Psalms — never leave it. If you have just come to the monastery, and in spite of your good will you cannot accomplish what you want, take every opportunity you can to sing the Psalms in your heart and to understand them with your mind. And if your mind wanders as you read, do not give up; hurry back and apply your mind to the words once more. Realize above all that you are in God's presence, and stand there with the attitude of one who stands before the emperor. Empty yourself completely and sit waiting, content with the grace of God, like the chick who tastes nothingand eats nothing but what his mother brings him.
Radiant Light by Fr Arthur Poulin, OSB Cam
Full Moon Over Big Sur by Fr Arthur Poulin, OSB Cam
The Dialogue of Love
"Christian prayer unfolds in a dramatic rhythm of two freedoms --- divine and human ---that interact with each other through the whole range of mutual relationships and attitudes. God gives us his love through the Spirit and He actively takes care of the world in dramatic action involving the whole of creation, a performance we can call Theodrama. (The Eremitic Life, Fr Cornelius Wencel, er cam, p 140)
Bursting Blooms, by Sr Kristine Haugen, ocdh
"God is bestowing a special favour on you by drawing you into the desert. The call is a matter of God's free choice; you will only be able to persevere in it by his condescension. You will always remember how privileged you are that God should love your soul, and as time goes on you will appreciate this all the more. . . . Humble and detached, go into the desert, For God awaiting you there, you bring nothing worth having, except your entire availability. . . .He is calling you to live on friendly terms with him, nothing else." The Hermitage Within
Blue Poppies, Sr Kristin Haugen, ocdh, Hermitage Arts
"Therefore, an authentic prayerful dialogue is possible only in the perspective of love. When two persons entrust themselves to each other in love, a wonderful drama of self-giving and co-possessing is played out. The closer the mutual relationships are, the more they determine all the levels of the two partners' personalities. The stronger the ties are, the more silence is needed and, paradoxically, the fuller the mutual understanding is. The knowledge and the fullness of self-giving that spring from prayer are related to the silence of love." (The Eremitic Life, Fr Cornelius Wencel, er cam, p 140)
Blue Lilies, Sr Kristine Haugen, ocdh, Hermitage Arts
"The hermit knows that it is possible to reach communion with God, who reveals his majesty and his mysterious, elusive presence in nature in a swift stream, in a quiet, misty valley, in the rolling waterfalls, in the ravishing smell of flowers. Prayer rooted in admiration of the world's natural beauty is an attempt to capture the manifest, but at the same time hidden presence of the eternal Mystery, a Mystery so great that it surpasses all that can be named, measured, or touched. Coming into a close, meditative contact with a mountain, a tree, or a flower, the person of prayer discovers that they are all anchored in a wonderful presence that reaches far above all we can know through hearing or sight." Fr Corneilus Wencel, The Eremitic Life, p160.
Cascade, by Sr Kristine Haugen, ocdh
Herons, by Sr Kristin Haugen, ocdh
"While discussing the eremitic life, solitude, and silence, we must never lose sight of the fact that the hermit , like any other Christian, lives in the community that is the Church. There is no doubt that (her) form of participation in the life of the Church differentiates (her) from many other brothers and sisters in faith. However, (her) whole existence is rooted in the community, and that is the key element that decides the Christian character of the way of the desert." (Fr Cornelius Wencel, The Eremitic Life, p 151.)