[[Dear Sister,
Is it reasonable to suggest a person continue to hope that one day her diocese will say yes to professing her if they have denied her petition three times already under two different Bishops? Couldn't this be unreasonable and encourage false hope?]]
It could be both unreasonable and encouraging false hope IF the person, after talking to the diocese to determine their concerns and issues with profession finds that the diocese feels she is simply not called to this vocation. In such a case I agree that it would be wiser to live the life she has at hand, accept that she is a lay hermit, at least for the time being, and work with her director to discern if this is what she truly feels called to do and be. Then, of course, she should act on what she discerns. Note well, the spiritual director does not affirm a vocation, nor say yay or nay to approaching the diocese at any point. She merely assists in the process of discernment; the actual decision is the person's she is directing. A person who expects her director to make such decisions for her may simply be proving how unready and perhaps unsuitable she is for the eremitical vocation.
However, as noted in an earlier post, there are a number of reasons a diocese may deny admission, and a number of these can be worked with over time. Sometimes they have to do with personal growth work that still needs doing. In such cases the combination of spiritual direction and psychological therapy might be necessary and produce amazing results. Most directors I know are happy to work in conjunction with a therapist --- especially if a vocation may be at issue. Of course, sometimes this is simply not enough and the person will never be admitted to profession. Diocesan vocation personnel and Vicars for Religious may be able to give the person an idea of their own sense of this. Sometimes the issue is on the diocese's side: they may decide they need to profess someone else first and see how it goes; they may need to do greater research on the nature of eremitical life and what makes a healthy hermit in the contemporary world and what does not. Occasionally a diocese is simply not open to professing anyone; they may not believe in the validity of eremitical vocations or there will be some other reason. Generally, however, it is always helpful to talk with whoever was in charge of one's case and get an honest appraisal of where one stands and why, difficult as that might also be.
The point is that if one lives as a lay hermit for a significant period, does the personal work one may still need to do, focuses on growth and maturation both spiritually and psychologically and is happy in genuine solitude (not isolation and not in narcissistic gratification!), one may be able to petition once again, and a diocese can change it's mind. It is not guaranteed and one does not live one's life expecting or pinning one's hopes on this; one simply lives as a lay hermit because eremitical life is one's calling whether or not canon 603 profession is ever in the frame. But once one works through whatever issues and concerns existed she may well see clearly that canonical standing is a necessary part of her own vocation and be able to make a much better case to the diocese. What is critical is that one not assume any of this but rather personally work hard to discern what it is to which one is truly called. A piece of that is really listening to the church in all of this and, unless there is a good reason to doubt it, trusting that they are acting in the best interest of the vocation which is, after all, an ecclesial one.
However, as noted in an earlier post, there are a number of reasons a diocese may deny admission, and a number of these can be worked with over time. Sometimes they have to do with personal growth work that still needs doing. In such cases the combination of spiritual direction and psychological therapy might be necessary and produce amazing results. Most directors I know are happy to work in conjunction with a therapist --- especially if a vocation may be at issue. Of course, sometimes this is simply not enough and the person will never be admitted to profession. Diocesan vocation personnel and Vicars for Religious may be able to give the person an idea of their own sense of this. Sometimes the issue is on the diocese's side: they may decide they need to profess someone else first and see how it goes; they may need to do greater research on the nature of eremitical life and what makes a healthy hermit in the contemporary world and what does not. Occasionally a diocese is simply not open to professing anyone; they may not believe in the validity of eremitical vocations or there will be some other reason. Generally, however, it is always helpful to talk with whoever was in charge of one's case and get an honest appraisal of where one stands and why, difficult as that might also be.
The point is that if one lives as a lay hermit for a significant period, does the personal work one may still need to do, focuses on growth and maturation both spiritually and psychologically and is happy in genuine solitude (not isolation and not in narcissistic gratification!), one may be able to petition once again, and a diocese can change it's mind. It is not guaranteed and one does not live one's life expecting or pinning one's hopes on this; one simply lives as a lay hermit because eremitical life is one's calling whether or not canon 603 profession is ever in the frame. But once one works through whatever issues and concerns existed she may well see clearly that canonical standing is a necessary part of her own vocation and be able to make a much better case to the diocese. What is critical is that one not assume any of this but rather personally work hard to discern what it is to which one is truly called. A piece of that is really listening to the church in all of this and, unless there is a good reason to doubt it, trusting that they are acting in the best interest of the vocation which is, after all, an ecclesial one.
On the other hand, a longer period of time as a lay hermit may allow a person to discern if solitude is a transitional period for them; if they actually work through the things which prevented them from being admitted more immediately to profession (it always takes several years) they may be able to discern that what they have been living is isolation, not genuine solitude, for instance, and with consecration out of the picture for the time being they may actually discern their petition had more to do with being enamored of the trappings that are associated with public profession/consecration. Finally, they may discover the significance and value of the lay eremitical vocation and decide to embrace it for the rest of their lives.
Hermits are formed in solitude, but it is a solitude which is usually continually supported and assisted by several significant relationships. When this is a person's true vocation they come to what canon 603 and the Carthusians refer to as, "the silence of solitude." Without a genuine call the person may live in physical silence and relative social isolation, but never come to "the silence of solitude" which is the quies which results from life in silent dialogue with God. This is one of the reasons I tend to argue that directors, diocesan personnel and Bishops must understand and discern the difference between merely living a pious life alone and this central element of canon 603. It is a key to discerning authentic vocations to eremitical solitude, whether consecrated or lay. Still, it may take some time and considerable personal work to give solitude a sufficient chance and see if it will bring forth the fruit of hesychasm, quies, or the silence of solitude canon 603 rightly regards as a non-negotiable element of the eremitical life.
Finally, I should note that dioceses cannot always (and usually do not) accompany a person during the whole of this time, but ordinarily they will be open to revisiting a person's situation to assess it afresh when significant personal work has been done and pertinent evaluations and recommendations are available which can shed a new light on the matter. This is especially true when the person has continued to live in genuine solitude, have come to the quies or silence of solitude the canon affirms as central, and can articulate good reasons as to why it is they still feel called to public profession rather than life as a lay hermit.
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